The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen Covey is the first book that anyone interested in self-improvement should read. Within are some very basic principles that are keys to success in life no matter the situation.

One of the concepts I have challenged repeatedly in my many writings has always been what I feel is a passive approach to personal growth and self-improvement. Without defining what character is, without taking a benchmark of individual good and bad qualities, without setting out a plan for what to do about each of those bad qualities and how to emphasize those good qualities, we proudly strut around claiming that various activities build character and change us for the better.

I do not believe that.

I do not believe that passively sitting back and waiting for age and random experiences to shape me into a better person. I don’t think that with someone like me that playing baseball, doing some karate, or riding my Jeep off-road will have enough character building impact to make me into the man that I wish I was.

There are ways to improve your character, however, and they are many. None of them is easy. There are many such programs out there. One of my favorites is Stephen R. Covey’s philosophy. What looks like a book you read and put down is actually more of a reference that you study and study until your brain begins to hurt.

While there are no exercises within the book or the audio version, this program of self-improvement and life change can be undertaken with conscious effort to adopt its principles for oneself. Reading the book once will not do the trick.

However, reading the book, memorizing the Seven Habits, and listening to his message of taking personal responsibility for everything that we might experience are a source of great improvement.

Many people attend a Seven Habits seminar for a day, and when I mention this book to them, they say “Oh yeah, I did that once.” But you have to work it, and work it every day. Slowly, over time, I have found that my tendency to scold myself has dropped, my perfectionism has abated a little, and my blaming of the people around me for my problems has practically disappeared.

Because of this book, I have experienced big changes in my life that I cannot imagine having happened otherwise.

There are no easy answers here. No easy advice you just follow and everything changes. This stuff is hard. It is not for timid, fearful people who are afraid to look inside themselves and find something that they are ashamed of. This is about doing things that other people will not want you to do. The hardest thing to do as a social human being is to change, because we surround ourselves with people who like us the way we are. Those people will actively resist any attempt to change you make. People fear change. Unfortunately, most people who read this will not have the guts to actually order the book or listen to the CD’s in their car repeatedly and begin following the principles. But I guess those folks are right where they need to be.

Concepts you will learn from the 7 Habits:

• A model of maturity
• The concept of responsibility
• Personality and Character Ethics
• Paradigm Shifts
• Circles of Influence
• Reactive vs. Proactive
• Centeredness
• The 7 Habits

I am grateful that I found this book, and I would like the opportunity to pass on something I feel I benefited from to you.

Seven Habits of Highly Effective People: Powerful Lessons in Personal Change